Wednesday, September 23, 2026

The Wayback Machine: Lawrence of Arabia Screening Ride

Originally scratched out in May of 2008, sixty fixed gear miles each way to see Lawrence of Arabia on the big screen:
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A message board I frequent garnered a real gem last weekend. Someone posted up that Lawrence Of Arabia was being screened in 70mm at the Aero in Santa Monica Friday night. I have seen the film before, but never on the big screen and the chance to see it both on the big screen and in 70mm was too much to pass up.
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Friday afternoon saw a 1PM wake-up after working all night the night before. The idea of battling through Friday afternoon traffic on four wheels had a very sour taste to it. The notion was spat out almost as soon as the bile began to rise and the gathering of enough gear to get across the LA Basin by bicycle began immediately at that point. By 2PM, the wheels were turning.
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A couple of quick stops were to be had at the onset. The closest bike shop was empty and acquiring a new spare tube was accomplished in a couple of minutes. There was no line at the closest ATM to the West and the acquisition of a few greenbacks went with nary a hitch. After those were both accomplished, it was off into the perpetual afternoon headwind.
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The initial stretch was largely Westbound. Main arteries were used for this because of the wind. Lollygagging delivery trucks, buses and any other sluggish large vehicles were utilized to their fullest potential. On Lincoln in Anaheim, a FedEx delivery van gave a really good draft for a couple of miles. On DelAmo in Lakewood, a bus did the same, providing welcome relief from the incessant headwind.
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Feeling like a break from sucking exhaust fumes, the Los Angeles River bike path was used from DelAmo to its terminus at Atlantic. The wind was favorable at times and even when not so favorable, the going was really good. It was nice to relax a bit and enjoy the scenery, especially the colourful tags on the bike path's surface. Is one considered a hater if they ride a bicycle over a tag?
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Weaving through the heavy industrial area after the terminus of the bike path was not as hectic as anticipated. Wide shoulders, light traffic and decent road surfaces prevailed. A few tight squeezes were encountered on a few zigs that should have been zags, but were handled with aplomb. Washington Blvd was a welcome sight, being the intended route to get West of LA proper.
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Washington Blvd is a little beat up and crowded, but makes a nice Westbound beeline towards Venice and Santa Monica. The conditions kind of see-sawed all of the way to Culver City, where a cut over to Venice Blvd and stop at a small market for a refuel and break took place. Venice Blvd has a Class II bike lane and is pretty fast, even in the seemingly perpetual afternoon headwind. The characters seemed to become more frequent and vociferous towards the coast. While stopped at Venice/Lincoln a rather large 50-ish gentleman asked, "Do you get many flat tires?" "Not today." "How far have you ridden today?" "From Disneyland." "oh"
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A swerve onto Abbot Kinney allowed entry into Venice and a quick burn to the coastline. The coast was slightly crowded, but burning into Santa Monica was much easier to get through than some of the traffic encountered earlier. A quick right turn on Montana followed by a twelve block plus change rip and the Aero was looming large.
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The dude at the box office said they expected to sell out and pre-sales for the show were high. They opened the doors at 6:30PM and the showtime was 7:30PM. That provided an hour to wander a little and grab a bite. The local hippy-dippy grocery store had a full service deli, so a sandwich fuel-up was in order. An accompaniment of Honest Tea's Moroccan Mint seemed like a fitting drink before watching a film that was partially shot in Morocco.
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Once the film started, it was obvious that the effort was not wasted. Such amazing cinematography, acting, and quality of the 70mm picture in Lawrence Of Arabia seems insurmountable. The crowd present in the packed theater was obviously made up of cinephiles, with barely a waver in the sea of heads, all eyes glued intently to the massive screen. The whole experience is one that will not soon be forgotten.
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Empty streets at night make for cool runnings, literally in shorts and a t-shirt at 11:30PM on a Spring night. The warm-up didn't take too long though and the yellow brick road that unfolded in front of the bike led towards West LA. Getting away from the dampness of the coast was a priority and the roads made familiar by many outings with the infamous Midnight Ridazz seemed like the right choice.
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The elevation gained by heading up Santa Monica Blvd was lost by dropping down Western Ave to land once again on Washington Blvd. The industrial area weave was even easier in the wee hours and Bandini Blvd, though quite putrid near the meat packing area, was a veritable racetrack. A few zigs and zags near the 710/5 split gave way to the largely Southeast running Telegraph Road.
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Beelining for the Orange Curtain went very fast until landing on Imperial Highway in La Mirada. Feeling a little punchy from not refueling since the sandwich and tea appeared to cause a bit of a short-circuit in the 'ol internal GPS. Recognizing a landmark at Imperial and Carmenita seemed to recalibrate the brain, where a turn South got the bike pointed in the right direction. The next open store known to stock fresh bananas encountered was the 7-11 at Moody and Crescent in La Palma.
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Without the stop in La Palma, the home stretch would have been difficult. With the stop, it went by like a blur in the night. There's something about being close to home on the tail end of a long ride that can make one feel like they are on autopilot. This in turn seems to make higher speeds attainable when they probably should not be. Maybe it's a creature of the night kind of thing, only experienced in the wee hours.
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There's something about arriving home after such an adventure that seems somewhat anticlimactic, yet satisfying at the same time. With one hundred and ten miles of fixed gear riding under the belt and fresh memories stored of a truly epic masterpiece about one of history's true heroes, there were only a couple of things left to complete the odyssey. A shower and two fingers of Bushmills 10 preceded the well deserved trip into slumberland.

Backcountry Bliss

When the CCC was building trail during the Great Depression, they weren't considering bicycles being in the user equation. The advent of modern "mountain biking" may be considered as the first forays onto these trails, however it was most assuredly not the first time many of these trails were attempted to be bicycled upon. The famous bicycle journey undertaken by the Buffalo Soldiers through The Heart of America lends heavily to that fact, as it was decades before the CCC even existed. Imagination, Determination, Woodcraft Skills, Mechanical Skills and Desire to explore the backcountry are most assuredly high ranking factors that have sent individuals on two wheels into the backcountry since the bicycle came to be. Historical footpaths, wagon roads, cattle trails, game trails and even large swaths of bare rock are also integral in the backcountry experience on bicycles, all of which can be ridden to certain extents framed by legality, Rider motivation and skills.
While backcountry mountain biking is understandably not for everyone, those seeking it out are becoming more infrequent, with the exception of the current bikepacker trend. The bikepackers either venture forth with preparedness, or tempt fate well beyond what casual enthusiasts face on crowded trails adjacent to metro areas experience. Yes, mountain biking is still an inherently dangerous undertaking anywhere it's performed, however the backcountry adds to this truth. Those who are intelligent enough to admit their limitations and adjust their aspirations accordingly can make day tripping into the backcountry a reality that doesn't have to be life threatening. Those who can't seem to believe anything beyond their own bullshit are seemingly tempting fate in the backcountry, especially when dependent upon electronic assistance to get there. This possibly explains the USFS exclusion of ecycles on non-motorized routes. They get enough SAR calls for service already and adding to that would be a burden they don't wish to be shouldered with. I don't blame them one little bit.
The Bliss of Backcountry riding is real for me, beginning with why I took mountain biking up to begin with. Enjoying the backcountry and the peace it provides me with is something I've always enjoyed from my first moments out there on foot as a kid. Being places and seeing things that only you and maybe a few close friends are privy to at any certain moment in time is priceless and IMO the height of truly living life. The learning experiences provided by the unpredictability of the backcountry are endless, as evidenced even yesterday when railing around a blind turn to see a loose rock as big as a medicine ball in the middle of the tread and relying on both my experienced speed (or lack thereof in this case) and bike's flickability to avoid spearing it with my front wheel. Then again, Riding In Control is essential in the backcountry and those who don't adhere to that increase their chances of becoming a SAR call for service, that is if their electronic deevice has both signal and a charge. Funny and also telling how much more important proper trail etiquette is in a backcountry setting as opposed to where Kooks Accumulate. Riders who get this often enjoy the Bliss of Backcountry for the same reasons mentioned above and also know that just about anyone encountered on a bicycle "out there" is most likely a Kindred Spirit.

Tuesday, September 8, 2026

Believing Your Own BS

 In a World that's filled with bovine fecal matter, why add to the stench? It's easy to see how the feeble may follow the crooked paths set by the various social engineers who have baffled them with their bombardment of thinly veiled hypnotism, but what about those who have an Intelligence Quotient that hovers around or is above room temperature? While some of the latter group may have also been told throughout their lives that they can "do whatever they want or set themselves to do" by parents, teachers, clergy, gurus, etc., they may be at more of a disadvantage because that is inherently untrue for anyone of any caliber. I witnessed many individuals who were quite intelligent come and go quickly from my profession of twenty years and the ones that clung onto it as long as possible for the sake of their fragile ego were merely believing their own stinky-assed bullshit. They were only fooling themselves.

 Those who believe their own bullshit from a bicycle saddle are a varied lot. My favorite ones to observe are amateur racers. While many amateurs are most assuredly just simple folk testing their limits or merely having fun with friends, the bullshit believers are a mix of madness who bring bad tidings that can be hilarious and sad all at once to witness. Getting all chippy about booby-prize level winnings, amateur rankings, or egotistical aspiration is total bullshit to anyone paying attention. This notion is furthered by amateur sandbaggers, who are a whole other level of bullshit. The list goes on, if you get my drift. The impacts of those who are unrealistic about their abilities on a bicycle in the dirt are many, and from environmental to social, their path of buttfunk permeates the trails they pollute.

The subset of those who ride mountain bikes and volunteer for trail work, are often just shown minimal skills in this vein and suddenly believe they know it all, sometimes negatively impacting whole trail systems. While some of their work under the umbrella of legitimate trail advocacy (legitimate being key here) can be proper, their "off the books" misdeeds are often fine examples of poor execution and sanitization. Sadly, poor execution may also emit from less than competent crews set forth by groups claiming to be advocates who believe thier own bullshit. Happening upon a trail that has had brush work where the crew left the trimmings in the trail bed is a prime example of poor execution. This is especially true when an antisocial media post from the group about their seemingly Herculean "good deed" includes a photo of their trail tools for the task with a rake in it. WTF? The next thing to be expected from a bullshit group like that would be laying claim to work they did not do. It's how the deluded roll.

How does one avoid the pitfalls of believing their own bullshit? Since we're all wired at least a little differently, there is no "one size fits all" solution that the mass media sells incessantly in regards to *anything*. I've been fortunate in my life to gain professions that are considered by some as "quiet professional", a prime key in the cog the mainstream populace seems to either not know of, or often forgets. Many times over the years, the only moments I have thought something I had done in my professions was exemplary, was when an esteemed peer made mention of such. To me, it was just doing what I was being paid to do at the level I could accomplish. The same is true when throwing my leg over a top tube, though not as a profession (except for when guiding). When an esteemed peer, or those who may even be many levels beyond me makes mention of something they see as exemplary in my riding, it's not bullshit, but a confirmation that I had a proverbial "moment in the sun". They are thanked and things are left at that, with maybe an explanation as to what the fuck I just did to appease their curiousity when asked that. Face it, we're all just some dude/dudette on a bike and trying to hard to be something else is just plainly and simply Bullshit. Believe That

Riders Come and Go, Kooks Accumulate

Thursday, September 3, 2026

Learn It, Then Burn It™


 The most simple way to improve one's skills on a mountain bike is to take your time and learn. This is also very low impact on the body, bicycle, and trails, with the latter being the focus here since that can and does impact everyone who may use them. Learning a singletrack with patience teaches how a trail responds to your input at varying levels and conditions, making for a much less impactful experience, especially if you're not very interested in impacting the ground with your body. Patience is not referred to as virtuous just so some old dude on a bicycle can preach, it's fact.

 Being fortunate and patient has helped me avoid a multitude of the trials and tribulations many incur while mountain biking. Besides being costly in regards to medical bills and bicycle upkeep or replacement, the extended toll on the body adds up rapidly for those less patient and/or fortunate. The careers of the "go big or go home" sect are most often very abbreviated for the abuse they put their bodies through. I asked a friend in SWUT once what happened to Josh Bender after he vanished from that scene and the response was, "He's learning how to ride a bike nowadays." I hope he still can, after all of the huge missed drops he undertook.

 Trails that are new to a Rider are most often handled with the proverbial kid gloves. While they have the skillsets to go faster than they initially choose to, they know that learning the trail at a respectable speed with patience will allow safer higher speeds for themselves, their bicycle, other trail users and the trail itself. The only times I have burned down a trail before learning it, has been while following a trusted local Rider on trails they are familiar with. Honestly, that's really the only legitimate shortcut and it's based solely on the competence of whom one follows. Following someone less than competent at speed can and will cause one or more of the impacts mentioned.

 If this seems like a foreign concept, try it the next time you ride a trail new (or unlearned) to you that you'll likely be returning to. If you are on a road trip and know it's probably the only time you'll ride a route, consider checking yourself before wrecking yourself, your bike, other trail users, or the trail itself. One of the main reasons I avoid marquee trails is the wrecks they have become due to the lack of diligence, etiquette, and patience of many who claim the title of Mountain Biker. Be a Rider and Learn It before you Burn It.

Riders Come and Go, Kooks Accumulate

Saturday, August 22, 2026

Blockheads


C.R.S. § 18-9-107 (Obstructing a Highway or Other Passageway): Makes it an offense to intentionally, knowingly, or recklessly block a place used for the passage of persons, vehicles, or conveyances, rendering passage unreasonably inconvenient or hazardous.

 Yesterday I encountered an elderly male hiker on the trail while ascending. He was surprised that I had yielded the trail to him and stated that it was the first time this Summer that anyone astride a cycle had yielded the trail to him, including the one person on a bicycle and another riding illegally upon the trail today with their ecycle (Poachers, a subject for another day) who I saw toodling down the trail before stopping for the hiker. While chatting with the hiker, I noticed a fresh scrape on his noggin and asked if he was alright or needed any assistance. He said he was okay and would be good in getting back to the trailhead. Then I asked how that had happened.

 Apparently the person on the bicycle was experiencing a  mechanical issue, effectively blocking the trail while attending to it. They had noticed the hiker approaching, yet failed to render the trail to the hiker. As the hiker left the trail bed to go around, he stumbled on the terrain and fell, injuring himself. He picked himself and his hiking staff back up and continued on, without any words or actions from the errant bicyclist. I'm not sure what kind of home training the bicyclist had as a child, but it was either severely lacking or they are a perennial dim-bulb. In the civilized world, one offers and/or renders assistance to injured parties. The lack of social ethics displayed by that cretinous individual should be astounding to me, but it's not.

 Before parting ways, I asked the hiker once again if they would like any help. They politely declined and added, "Well it was my fault that I stumbled and fell." to which I replied that it was not their fault and in fact the person blocking the trail was doing so contrary to state law. This incident is *why* there is a law against blocking a public passageway. To think that common sense and courtesy in an instance such as this must be made law makes the whole occurrence unsurprising.

Riders Come and Go, Kooks Accumulate

Monday, August 17, 2026

Before, During, After

1996 Dyno Nitro 24 BMX Restoration

Before:

During:

After: 

 This rusty and crusty 'ol girl was dropped off a little while back and has been the "get at it here and there" kind of project. The frame was first in line because of the dents and further inspection items I like to begin with. Totally worth the time and effort, she's a roller now!

The only sad bikes are the ones that don't get ridden.

Thursday, August 13, 2026

Fifteen Minutes


 In the modern quest for "fame", those seeking their Warholian fifteen minutes astride a mountain bike are a strange lot to me. The air of desperation emanates from many who seem to be seeking this kind of attention, whether they are wedging their way into obtaining status as the big fish in a little pond, or simply sandbagging amateur races. The reek is real and painfully obvious to anyone even remotely paying attention. Yeah, that shit stinks, even if it is sadly amusing. 

 To me, fifteen minutes is how long a normally twenty minute descent went this morning, as indicated by my analog timepiece. Warhol may have gotten it right for those who earn their way or stumble into fame, however Bowie got it right for the desperate with, "Fame (fame) puts you there where things are hollow." Hollow is no way to go through life, kiddies.


Riders Come and Go, Kooks Accumulate


PS I rode the aforementioned trail section in ten minutes flat yesterday evening. No hikers to yield to and perfect conditions. Could I ride it faster? Most likely yes, but not being able to stop in time for a hiker around a blind turn is not cool, or even fast for that matter.

The Wayback Machine: Lawrence of Arabia Screening Ride

Originally scratched out in May of 2008, sixty fixed gear miles each way to see Lawrence of Arabia on the big screen: - A message board I...